Fuck You Alejandro Cao de Benós de Les y Pérez. Seriously. Fuck You, Man

Posted: 2010EAMR +0000October UTC09AM J+000039 in Diplomacy, DPRK, Kim Il-Sung, Kim Jong-Il, Kim Jong-Un, Korean Workers Party, North Korea, Round-Eyes, Third Extraordinary Meeting of the Korean Workers Party
Tags: ,

Y’all know me as a patient nigga, amirite?

Jong-Un? Yeah, he tha most patient muthafucka up in this muthafucka people be saying to me.

He tha most qualified nigga to be running this place but he got big love for the Old Man and big love for all his Party niggas so he be patient, yo. That be what they is saying also.

But there is one chump ass muthafucka makes me lose all my patience, yo.

Fuck you Alejandro Cao de Benós de Les y Pérez. Seriosly. Fuck you, man.

That nigga’s days are numbered, man, for real.

Check it. Tha A to tha C to tha little ass d and tha B be some kind of foreign representative of the Culture Ministry. He run this punk ass crew called the Korean Friendship Association in Spain. They organize tours for tha Round Eyes and shit and tell the world about the Juche ideal and how it be all ideal and shit and all the shit they be talking about tha D to tha P to tha R to tha K be all make believe and shit.

So basically he do all the chump ass shit that no one in the Master Race wanna do, yo.

And check it: we don’t even pay tha nigga. We just throw some scrawny ass hookers his way from time to time and make sure he got plenty of skratchy ass Mao suits and Kim Il-Sung badges and that nigga be good to go.

Funny thing is, he believing pretty much anything we saying to him. He believe shit that none of us even believe – and we be tha niggas that make it all up to begin with.

He say he wanna be a “soldier for Kim Jong-Il” and shit.

Maaaaaan. Most of my homies are for real “soldiers for Kim Jong-Il”. Lemme tell you man, it ain’t as much fun as he be making out, yo.

So there be a lot of suspicion about this nigga in the corridors of Choson Power. Also in the State Ministry for Gas & Water Supplies. Some people thinking he just some crazy nigga to be all loving on the DPRK. Some doctor said that it was a case of Yellow Fever that went all crazy ass. Like he just be digging on skinny ass bug chicks but somehow it all go messed up with fidelity to the revolutionary line of Kim Il-Sung and Kim Jong-Il or some shit.

Me, I just wish that Round Eye nigga wouldn’t clap and cheer so loudly at Party meetings.

For real. He be hollering so loud at that Extraordinary meeting we had that I could hear him from down the front from where he be sitting in the cheap ass round eyes seats way up the back.

You know what else I hate about the chump? The way he always posing and walking around like he some action figure. Check it:

He thinks he’s Buzz Lightyear or something.

And I hate the way the Old Man be all loving on him and shit. He be saying to me all the fucking time, “why can’t you be a faithful soldier of Kim Jong-Il like Alejandro?”

That shit’s for chumps, man.

He be all like, “Alejandro would never have endangered the security of our Peoples Republic’s counterfitting operations by ordering the printing houses to make up phoney US $69 dollar bills and then release them on the black market in Hong Kong strip clubs. Alejandro wouldn’t have gotten drunk and spewed up in Kim Dae-Jung’s limosine and endangered historic diplomatic talks. Alejandro wouldn’t sleep until noon every day. Alejandro wouldn’t contract dengue fever from screwing around with Burmese street hoes on a trade mission to Vietnam.”

Man. Some times I think the Old Man wishes that Alejandro was his son.

That gets me all hurt inside and shit.

I think I’m gonna plant a bag full of fake US dollars and a US passport in that niggas apartment when he’s next back in town. Let’s see how Mr Faithful Soldier explains that shit, yo…

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Comments
  1. Leroy Smith says:

    It would have been a much better article against this loser if it hadn’t been written in this over-the-top fake ebonics style.

  2. Doc says:

    I’m interested in the fact that the less secure a man is, the more likely he is to have extreme prejudice.

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